this sucks
Posted on 17. Apr, 2009 by Victor in everything else
We got news yesterday that the courts have decided to try family reunification with Bruno’s little sister. I am trying to keep my chin up and I know that the social workers are pushing for us. I also know that the father of a child should have a fair shake in the legal system to see if they are fit to raise said child.
But, this is really bullshit. I mean, without getting too much into my son’s background – the type of people he came from is NOT the type of people who should be raising kids. I mean, if you really knew the story you’d be shocked to think a judge would actually grant our child back to one of her parents.
So now we get to wait another six months to see if he can jump through the hoops to prove that he can parent. And the way the court system works (at least according to Tony, who works for the courts) if they say he has ten things he has to do and he only completes a few of them, the judge can make extension after extension to get him to the point of being “good enough”. I’m sorry but good enough is NOT good enough.
I am really just venting but I figure I should post something because people keep asking about when the baby is coming. So, as of right now she’s not coming home anytime soon. Dammit.
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6 Responses to “this sucks”
See Victor EVERYWHERE!
marc
17. Apr, 2009
sorry to hear this, Victor. Went through this a couple of times with foster kids, and I know how frustrating and infuriating it can be.
Phil in Colorado
17. Apr, 2009
I’m hoping the best for you! It’s a frustrating process for adoptive parents. When we were placed with our son’s new brother and sister, it was after the kids had been through a long process of trying to re-unify. To make it more complicated, the two were half-brother and sister, and there was a time where she went to her bio dad, which if it worked out, would’ve split the kids into different homes. Stay strong – this is a thing where you have to put your whole heart into it, no matter the outcome, for her. Good luck, and you have all of our best wishes over here.
Will
17. Apr, 2009
It really does suck, Victor and I feel very badly for the three of you. You and Tony may need to discuss what you’ll do if you should lose her–would you want to be in contact with her biological father so that Bruno can know his sister eventually, or would you rather close that door? It’s a powerful issue.
My very best to you all as you go through this.
Nick
18. Apr, 2009
Man, that sucks, Victor! We had a similar experience with a kid we were looking at before we got our 2. The dad was in PRISON and was still able to make a claim through a second-hand family member. I know this feels so unfair and that the system is letting Bruno’s sister down, but have hope!
Moby
20. Apr, 2009
Being someone who was taken from my birth parents as an infant, I am in total agreement with you bud. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for parental rights, however it is obvious the parent(s) are not emotionally equipped to deal with raising a child.
Maybe once they see how much work is actually involved, they will bail. I know you had your heart set on this. Chin up young person, there is always room for hope over dispair.
*bear hug*
David
21. Apr, 2009
Tough news to hear. I wish you all the best in the process.
My hubbie and I were made an official adoption family on Friday for our 3 y/o daughter after 11 months. We also met her birth mom for the first time who has 3 of her 6 kids in her custody. What a day it was. Intense in many ways. It was nice to finally move to the adoption phase and finally meet our daughter’s mother. She’s really trying to get things back together, and we hope that Asha will be able to have some relationship with her. This foster adoption process is complicated. Those of us who can do it successfully are unique families. I applaud you for your courage and conviction.