Wednesday, November 08, 2000
no election talk here.i used to do a lot of acid in my younger days. it was cheap and fun and lasted a whole lot longer than today's club drugs. one saturday afternoon my friend fred and i did this acid that gave me the craving for those hostess cupcakes. the one with the squiggle on top. mmm. we left the house (first mistake) got in the car (second mistake) and drove to the grand union (third mistake). it had just be re-done, so it was huge and white and bright. i grabbed a shopping cart and started down the fresh vegetable aisle. at the end of the aisle i saw this little old lady. i thought to myself, "jeez, that lady is so old she could probably drop dead any minute." then my mind started to race with the thoughts of what if she does die, what if she drops dead right in front of me, what will i do? as i approached her i thought, "my god, she's going to grab me, she's going to grab me!" then i thought, "wait, she may have some final words, some little nugget of truth that she wants someone to know before she dies. i may be that person" well, i eventually rolled my cart by her and sure enough, she grabbed me. she slowly leaned forward and whispered the most fucked up thing you could say to a person tripping on acid.
cottage cheese
she said cottage cheese. thinking back on it, she was probably just asking me where to find it in the store, but at that moment i was sure that she knew something about large curd that i did not. well, that was enough for me. i turned the corner to get fred and realized that he had crawled underneath the brachs candy cart. he kept pointing and then i saw it. about 10 black women in pink rollers (gurl, i gosta get the hair ready for church tomorrow...) were coming down the aisle. i pulled him up to his feet and we ran to the snack aisle. thank god, they had the cupcakes. we then had to wait for what felt like an eternity in the express line to buy the damn thing. i learned a valuable lesson that day and maybe if i have a flashback i'll remember it.
11/08/2000 04:15:00 PM | link me
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